How do you have a great marriage? That’s the million dollar question. I don’t know of any guy that proposed to his girlfriend with the lofty goal of having a mediocre life together. No, the desire is much different, but how you get there is worthy of discussion.
Her comment surprised me. It was made nonchalantly to her friend, but definitely caught my ear as I thought about the weight of her words. “This has been the toughest year of our marriage.” It’s one thing to hear someone admit that, it’s an entirely different thing when it is your own wife that says it.
Many men are good at going to church. But when it comes to leading their wives spiritually, its a completely different story. Their lives are marked by passivity covered in shame. Deep down, they know they should be doing something, but they can’t quite put their finger on exactly what that is.
I’m one of those people that don’t follow the rules too well. It’s not that I don’t want to. Many times, it’s that I didn’t understand the directions in the first place. Every once in a while, though, this ends up being a blessing in disguise.
There is something unique about doing pre-marital counseling with engaged couples. As you talk with them they giggle, they blush, and they insist on holding hands throughout the entirety of the session. Conflict is far from their minds. Instead, they have visions of white picket fences, sunsets and cute puppies. Then they get married.
Bad dates with your spouse are almost as bad as not going on dates at all. Men, we often have the best of intentions when we go out to dinner with our wives. We might even follow up dinner with coffee. Chances are, though, that the conversation never goes deeper than a pithy overview of the week’s activities.
This is an invitation. No, it’s a challenge. It is a challenge for all you young guys that follow my blog that are looking at some point in the future to get engaged. I am throwing down the gauntlet. When that day comes when you are to get engaged, I want you to beat my story.
It’s true. Occasionally, my wife and I get into it. Figuratively speaking, we kick, punch, claw, wrestle and just plainly get mad. Throughout our marriage, the fighting hasn’t gotten better; it’s actually intensified. And now here we sit, with a total of 5 kids in our home, and we realize we have a problem. The problem: we aren’t fighting enough.